11 weeks

Today marks 11 weeks for me. As far as I know, I am still pregnant. It has been 3 weeks since my last appt and one week to go until my next. I didn't expect to go four weeks between appointments and the lack of reassurance that all is well is starting to weigh on me. My last appt. was with the RE after my surprise BFP. And my new obgyn (who I have not met) could not get me in until 12 weeks since I am a new patient. Sigh. With my pregnancy with Baby C I had ultrasounds every 2 weeks throughout which helped ease my anxiety. I miss my old OB, but not much I can go since I now live in another State.

At 10 weeks, I stopped the pro.gesterone as instructed. Boy do I not miss it! Coincidentally or not, my nausea has eased up considerably since then. Overall I was much more nauseous this go around and now I suppose it was much in part to the medication. However, now that my biggest symptoms are gone I get worried that things might not be going well in utero. Previously morning sickness lasted 14 weeks for me.

I am trying to remain optimistic and remind myself that last time we checked this baby's heart was beating and s/he was developing on track. Then my mind goes to the crazy place and reminds me that was before 10 weeks, when the rate of miscarriage drops. Oh I would have really appreciated an u/s at 10 weeks to know where we stand.

So.. time to stay busy, distracted and positive for the next several days until my next appt.

I am sad to read about a couple of first trimester losses of fellow bloggers this week. I look forward to celebrating the news of a couple of blogger friend's baby's arrivals in the next few weeks!!

8 weeks

Eight and a half weeks and still pregnant!

Our ultrasound a few days ago showed a gummy bear with a beating heart. Whew!  I'm still as sick as ever. The good thing about that, I suppose, is it's distracting me from worrying about the pregnancy. I feel too sick to think about anything else.

We had some family visiting from out of town recently, so we disclosed our news to them. They kept asking when the due date is. Honestly, I don't know. I haven't been told a date and I haven't calculated one. I can add up the months in my head and get a general timeframe, but I try not to think about it. These are the things we do when we've experienced loss. We are a bit guarded. There's still such a long way to go.

I was released from the RE, which is exciting. Still a couple of weeks to go before the rate of miscarriage drops, however. Before my last RE appointment, I met with a perinatalogist to get one final opinion about l.ovenox. They were firm in their opinion that I do not need it and provided a thorough explanation. I finally have peace of mind with that decision. Hoping for the best.

I was able to get a referral for an obgyn in my new city. It's a women's group- I really hope I like them. I am missing my former ob very much. He was with us throughout it all, and was incredibly sensitive to our anxiety during my second pregnancy (the one after our loss of baby S, which resulted in baby C). He did lots of monitoring, including ultrasounds every two weeks. He also did a great job with my unplanned c-section. I'm not sure if a new ob will put me at ease the way he did, but I hope so. I guess I will find out in a couple of weeks.