20 weeks

Tomorrow I will be 20 weeks pregnant. It's nice to reach this milestone of hitting the half-way mark, and also completing the level II ultrasound. Time feels like it is moving slowly, but I am able to stay somewhat distracted chasing a toddler around. However, the 2nd trimester is not an easy one for me. Since I've had an unexplained loss at 21 weeks, it doesn't feel that different from the 1st trimester when many people worry about possible loss.

I have been feeling the baby move since 16 weeks. The moment that I felt that first movement was an emotional and happy one for me. Since then I have had a couple of days where the baby was quiet and I began to worry (ok, panic), but so far things are going well (and thank goodness for my doppler for those moments).  My level II ultrasound was last week. Thankfully everything looked good. I had it done at the peri.natologist's office. It was an ultrasound tech who completed it, and she was also in training. Therefore it was taking her a long time to locate what she was looking for and there was way too much silence. I finally had to ask if everything looked ok. I then informed her that a long period of silence is not comforting to the patient.

I've had a second appointment at my new obgyn's office. I am still feeling a bit uneasy and really missing my former ob. I am not used to such a large practice. They have an excellent reputation, but so far it feels much more impersonal and appointments are more rushed than Iam used to. I am hoping that within in the next couple of appointments I will have established a more comfortable/trusting relationship with a doctor there and will hopefully feel better about that.

Physically, I am feeling much less nauseous but still not feeling great. Not complaining as I am just thrilled and grateful to be pregnant- however, it is a little annoying. I am definitely getting bigger faster this time around. I've been lazy lately and need to step up the exercise and start eating a little better.

So we didn't find out the sex of the baby. I don't know if I will make it through to full term without finding out, but for now it's a surprise. DH thinks the baby is a boy, whereas I had been thinking possibly a girl. I have had two vivid baby dreams though... In one I was holding the swaddled baby, who had just been delivered- and it was a boy. Last night I dreamt that we were at an appointment and we asked the doctor about the sex and she said we are having a boy. We shall see! The nice thing there will be no disappointment as I truly do not have a preference and will be beyond happy to a live, healthy baby.