tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7825586412870683556.post517527431146539576..comments2023-10-23T14:20:34.334-07:00Comments on not rated PG: Am I that person?CeCehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07810772967886741377noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7825586412870683556.post-51147486972964813052010-02-20T15:21:21.356-08:002010-02-20T15:21:21.356-08:00It is still hard to know what to say, even if you ...It is still hard to know what to say, even if you have experienced a loss yourself. <br /><br />My doctor told me exactly the same thing as your closing line, he told me to be grateful if people said anything at all. <br /><br />You said something and I'm sure you said it sensitively, even if you feel you didn't. I would have loved to have received a message like the one you left. You are a good friend. xCatherine Whttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01618295389400457254noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7825586412870683556.post-78997564747755528922010-02-20T08:35:25.620-08:002010-02-20T08:35:25.620-08:00I actually made a list of the stupid things people...I actually made a list of the stupid things people said to me after my losses (posted it a long time ago - July I think) and now try to be very vigilant about not saying those things to anyone EVER! But I often wonder if I used to say them before I knew how offensive they can be. I know most people who say these things have only good intentions, so I can't hold a grudge against any idividual, but hearing them over and over again is crushing. Hopefully your friend heard only your best intentions.Anniehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12316978989809741699noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7825586412870683556.post-41888529090860422572010-02-19T16:16:04.270-08:002010-02-19T16:16:04.270-08:00I've recently done this, too. It's hard t...I've recently done this, too. It's hard to know what to say, even when you've been through it and have accepted what happened. You just never know if what you say is going to cause offense, and it is something I never really thought much of before I had all of my miscarriages.<br /><br />I actually have a very close friend who has been TTC for the past five years. We've experienced our pain together (her not being able to get pregnant, and me not staying pregnant), but now that I'm pregnant, I've noticed that she is finding ways to aviod me. I'm trying not to take it personally, and I know that she is hurting. I don't know what to do about this-- she is my best friend. I just wish she'd hit the jackpot soon.Mehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02940842982543866147noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7825586412870683556.post-41624559948268936272010-02-19T13:15:16.978-08:002010-02-19T13:15:16.978-08:00I call this "conversation regret." It h...I call this "conversation regret." It happens to me all the time - that feeling of "crap, I just put my foot in my mouth." The thing is, it's not always things that "normal" people would even think twice about, but especially when it's in relation to pregnancy or losses, I sometimes wish I had said something different after I hang up the phone/ end the conversation. <br />Let's hope that your friend takes your message as it was intended and feels the love and care that you were trying to convey.LuckyOncehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07778768854314345726noreply@blogger.com